I Shoved Clorox Up My Ass and Now I Can Read Minds

You don’t wanna know where I put the Lysol. [Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash]

I never thought this would happen. I’m just a simple girl with a simpler brain and I thought I was being smart when I shoved some Clorox up my ass. I mean, think about it. Disease is germs. Germs is bad. Bad starts with a capital B, which rhymes with P, which stands for pool. So I got into a kiddie pool and squatted down and put some fucking Clorox up my ass. And you know what? It was way easier than I…